Hello fellow creatives,
It certainly has been a while, but I’m doing my best to get back on the horse!
My absence from blogging and all around writing isn’t because Covid restrictions were lifted and I went on a fancy holiday somewhere abroad, remote and sunny. In fact it has nothing to do with breaks of any kind.
Mental health is something I have always battled over the years, and this time it hit with an unrelenting fierceness that I hadn’t quite expected, and so writing this is very raw for me.
No one can warn you of what happens when you fall off the wagon with your mental health, and you never know how it’s going to affect you. I myself have experienced so many different effects from my own struggles that I never know what I may face with the next stint.
The affects of Covid and lockdown have affected everyone and I am no different. I lost my grandfather to this awful illness all too suddenly, I have had to manage my pregnancy virtually alone in regard to doctors appointments and meetings with my midwife. This all took its toll and consequently spiralled into depression. It stopped me from doing and enjoying the things that I loved the most. Writing, reading, taking my son out on day trips, I gave it up to spend most of my time inside on the sofa.
Even now, with help from therapy and support from my extremely patient husband, my drive hasn’t quite come back. There is no sense of enjoyment or accomplishment when I try to write, my imagination has dimmed when reading and I struggle to focus.
I say this not to complain about how hard mental health can be, but to express to those who share in my struggles that they are not alone.
I know my flair for writing and reading will return to me with time, I know that I can ride through this wave and come out the other side with my aspirations still intact. Mental health is not something to be ashamed of, patience with yourself and self-care is key. It’s ok not to feel ok.
And I know that soon enough I’ll be back to my old self and better than ever.